Do I really have to drive there?

My Wednesday commute included 7:00a traffic approaching the GWB on my way to White Plains, NY.
I so did not to want to drive there, I don’t know what it is about North Jersey traffic that I detest so much, but I think I’d rather driver twice as far south or west then drive north during rush hour.

I hate it so much!!


Just when you think your day is bad.

I was listening to This American Life on a my commute back from Long Island to Southern New Jersey today.  In this podcast, I listened to a mother tell a heart wrenching story about her struggles with her eldest son’s behavior toward her and his younger siblings.  So the next time you think your day is bad, read or listen to this family’s struggle in trying to keep a family together and provide unconditional love to their eldest son.

The family’s blog.

Audio podcast of This American Life.




My me time

It’s after 8:30 in the morning, and I sit at my kitchen table, winter sun shining in through the windows, I am the only one awake in my house right now.

My wife was awake a little earlier, but has chosen to try and go back to sleep after her morning pee when she asked me to turn the volume on the podcast I was listening to in bed down a little.  Before coming downstairs myself, I checked on my kids, my oldest had another night where she had almost completely wrestled her covers nearly off of her bed.  When I checked, her lower back and feet were exposed to the chilly morning air.  It’s a crisp 11 degrees outside this morning and the house is proportionally chilly.  I straightened out the covers and recovered her back up. Immediately after doing so, she went from the fetal position she most likely spent the last few hours in trying to keep warm, to a full on stretching out underneath her comforter and blanket.  I received no visual or audile clues from her that she was ready to waken.  Next, I checked on my son, who was bundled up in his bed  and appeared to be very content, after I quietly asked if he was still asleep he gave me a slight nod , telling me he wasn’t ready to leave the warmth of his bed just yet.  After I softly told him that I’d see him down stairs a little later, he flashed the sign for I love you.

I’m sitting here, looking at the steam coming off my cup of coffee while I feel the suns rays warming my face.   The sound of the furnace blowing warm air is below me in the basement while I feel the warmth it’s providing on my lower legs.  In another hour, the house will be fully awake and we will come up with an adventure for the four of us to have today. Image

This my me time.

My comfort zone.

Today, I’ve basked in my comfort zone.  Both of my kids are sick, and both my wife and I are not feeling great.  My daughter has a sinus infection that has found it’s way to into her eyes.  She’s a trooper and has not let her lingering cough from the last two weeks get her spirits down.  My son, who’s dealing with a sore throat and a mild fever today and is simply not himself.  They both did visit the doctor yesterday, however, his strep test came back negative.  Their explanation; his molars are coming in.  After seeing him today, I don’t buy this explanation, but not sure what else can be done at this point.  Poor kid.

We’ve stayed at home yesterday and today, minus the Dr. visits yesterday morning.  We all slept late today and we had breakfast around noon today, a simple one of sausage and croissants.

My daughter sits on the couch next to me, with her headphones on, she’s playing games on Disney’s website and I occasionally hear her talking to herself or the game.  My son, is resting up in my bed watching TV in our bedroom.  He’s bundled up under the covers and we’re waiting for the next time we give him some Tylenol to help relieve him of his head and throat pain and reduce his fever.

I did some Christmas shopping today on Amazon today.  I got gifts for my wife, both of my kids, and for my Mom.  I think today’s purchase was the most items I’ve purchased in a single sitting, though not the most expensive.  I’ve vowed to my wife, that I was going to try and do all of my shopping online this year, avoiding stores as much as possible and the anxiety that goes along with seeing empty shelves.  There’s still more that I want to get, but I think I’ll wait until my wife gets paid next week.

I’ve been sitting on the couch this afternoon watching the Eagles game, where they seem to be on their way to another win under Nick Foles leadership.  There’s less about 6 minutes remaining in the game and the Eagles are up by 10 over the Cardinals.  I have the game on mute and I’m listening to my favorites playlist on iTunes.  My wife is at the grocery store right now.

Right now, despite everyone not feeling 100%, I thought this was a good weekend.  I was off on Thursday and Friday for the holiday, add in Saturday and Sunday and the 4 days off was just enough to recharge my batteries.  The weather has been typical Delaware Valley fall weather, cool and cloudy.  I’m not sure the sun had come out at all over the last few days.  Despite not seeing much of the sun over the last few days, my energy level is up.  I’m in a very good mood right now, and have everything I need.

I do not want today to end, despite everyone not feeling well, I only wish they’d start to feel better.

The start to my weekend.

As I lay there, I feel the gentle push of air from the ceiling fan, the room is completely dark, save for a few hits of light coming from around the blinds and the clock on the cable box.  I squint at the clock and see it’s 4:31am.

My back, hips, feet are aching as I try to get comfortable on my old mattress.  I toss and turn; my wife is dead to the world right now.  Although I can barely see her, I sense her presence and non-movements and hear her rhythmic breathing.  She will not be waking any time soon, at least if she gets her way. The house is completely silent, except for the sounds of the sleeping.

My body seems to wake itself around this time every morning, with my alarm clock scheduled to announce its self with in the next 30 minutes.  As I try looking into the darkness, it is warm in our room, just under the threshold of being uncomfortable.  I have an old quilt covering my aging and aching body.  After I push this quilt aside, I feel the air from the ceiling fan hitting my feet and legs and instantly start too cool down. I position myself under a sheet, and start to prepare myself for my alarm clocks version of revelry.

A thought occurs to me. I’m too tired, something is not right. I’ve already gone through this early morning routine for the last the last few days. While I don’t count the consecutive number of days in my head, my body’s fatigued state is sort of like it’s own calendar. My internal calendar and clock are telling me something.  After a few seconds of processing, I’ve come to the realization that it is Saturday morning.

I won’t have to hear my alarm clock shortly.  I won’t have to go to work today.  I don’t need to get up any time soon.  I can sleep late today.  It is this surprise revelation that I find to be some of the greatest and short-lived joy in my life as of late.  It’s the actual act of realizing that I can sleep late, which brings me so much euphoria, albeit short lived.  My body craves the rest, will the few more hours of sleep that may allow me to stay up tonight well past 10:00pm, 11:00pm; maybe?

I reposition myself and move my pillow, straighten my legs and stretch.  I prepare for a long sleep.  How late will I be able to sleep today?  Would I actually be able to sleep until 9:30?  10:00am?  In reality, it is just 7:15.  But that 2 hours and 45 minutes was enough, according to my body that was all I needed today, anything more would just be greedy.

I will go through this again tomorrow, no doubt whatsoever.  And the euphoria as I realize that I can sleep late again will not be diminished one bit.  I have gone through this early morning weekend routine for the last few months, and each time is as exciting as the last.  This is my weekend.